Iron Eagle IV

Where does it go wrong for some actors? In 1982 Lou Gossett Jr won an Oscar for An Officer and a Gentlemen.  

After a career spent mainly in TV, the role and acclaim he received should have been the launching pad to silver screen success. Unfortunately, Lou chose to make Jaws 3 and the prospect of a glittering career quickly evaporated. 

By 1986 his unerring ability to involve himself in middling films took him to Iron Eagle. It was a ridiculous – although likeable - film about a teenager who steals a fighter jet so he can daringly rescue his father who’s being held hostage in the Middle East. (Gosset plays a retired air force colonel who assists the kid).  

Dismissed by critics as a jingoistic fairy tale, the film somehow spawned three sequels. And Gossett, ever the glutton for punishment, signed up for each and every one of them, including Iron Eagle IV (1995). 

The plot sees Gossett’s character running a flight school with a bunch of misfit teenagers for pupils. They stumble upon some corrupt air force pilots who are dealing in toxic waste. Naturally, there are no federal or state agencies interested in these murky shenanigans, so it falls to the teenagers to foil the conspiracy. 

Anyway, to the exploding helicopter. This occurs as the toxic waste plot unravels. The corrupt General decides it’s time for his men to make a retreat when the airfield he’s operating from is shot up by one of Gossett’s flight cadets in an F-16. 

One of the General’s men grabs a machine gun and jumps on board a waiting helicopter. As it takes off the F-16 comes in for another pass on the airfield. The soldier desperately tries to shoot down the F-16, but is hopelessly outgunned by the fighter jet which turns it into a chopper fireball. 

Artistic merit 

A nice juicy looking fireball. And we get to enjoy it again and again, as the editing allows us to see the same explosion repeated from different angles. However, the helicopter stays largely intact. It would’ve been nice to see it properly blown apart. 

Exploding helicopter innovation 

Director Sidney J Furie doesn’t advance the exploding helicopter genre. That’s disappointing as The Ipcress File is one my favourite films and he did such a good job on that. 

Number of exploding helicopters 

1. 

Positives 

The helicopter is the corrupt General’s personal vehicle, and delightfully he’s taken the trouble to stencil his name on the side. A nice touch. 

The chopper in question is also pleasingly featured on the poster for the film. 

Negatives 

 You do have to wonder if any soldier would be stupid enough to try and escape in a helicopter with a F-16 buzzing around. Is this what they teach at West Point? 

Interesting fact 

Iron Eagle IV features the character Doug Masters who might be familiar to viewers as the guy who was shot and killed in Iron Eagle II. What makes it even more bizarre is that the revived Doug Master isn’t played by the same actor. As he isn’t integral to the plot why bother resurrecting him? 

Battle: Los Angeles

Oh, dear. This is a lurching Frankenstein of a movie, made from successful bits of other films clumsily cut out and stitched back together.

Look! There’s District 9’s spaceship. Wow. There’s Independence Day’s stirring speech to the troops. Hey. Isn’t that the big Hummer from Aliens driving through a confined, tunnel-like structure and mowing down all the, er, aliens?

The film lumbers from scene to stolen scene, each one only reminding the viewer how much better the originals were. Even Aaron Eckhart seems aware something’s not right, and he kept a straight face all through The Core.

And in a movie that lifts so shamelessly from its betters, the odds that each helicopter was going to thrum-thrum its way safely through to the final credits were always narrow.

How we reach the pivotal scene is thus: a small band of marines is, for no good reason whatsoever, sent deep into alien-held LA territory to rescue some people from a police station. (Note for military fans: the latest marine-enemy-incursion technique is to walk full stride down the centre of enemy-occupied streets talking loudly about relationships.)

The aliens – a spectacular piece of filching: essentially District 9 prawns with Predator heads – pretty much let the marines walk to the police station, then lay siege to it (just like in Assault on Precinct 13). Before long, the heroes also catch a live alien and experiment on it (Independence Day again) and escape in a runaway bus (Speed).

Having established its cut-and-paste credentials so confidently, by the time a ‘rescue’ helicopter lands next to the station the only real question is how it’s going to be despatched. Now, I don’t want to spoil all the fun, so I’ll just lay out the bare facts and see if you can guess.

The helicopter lands and is loaded full of injured marines – several of whom have been given hastily constructed ‘backstory’ in the opening scenes (pregnant wife, something to prove etc) so we care about them. At the very last moment, Aaron Eckhart runs out of the station holding two young children, but is JUST TOO LATE to get the adorable young scamps aboard the unquestionably safe airborne vehicle before it takes off.

As to what happens next? Well, I was as shocked as you’ll be. The helicopter is barely 50 feet in the air when a District 9-lite spaceship either shoots or goes straight through it. (I’ve rewound three times and still don’t know. The CGI is terrible and the editing so fast-cut that Michael Bay reportedly wrote in to complain.)

The explosion itself is prime computer-generated-tat. Tonnes of burning shards of unconvincingly rendered metal and rotor blades crash down all around the marines and kids. However, given that such a quick death would afford no opportunity for a final ‘Give this to my wife’ / ‘Marines. Ra-hoo!’ emotive speech, no-one is even scratched.

Not that you’re interested, but that woman from Girlfight – here making her turn in Avatar look like Sophie’s Choice – works out that if they can just destroy this one, hard to reach silo then the whole baddie infrastructure will come toppling down (Star Wars, anyone?). By the final scene, I felt like toppling over myself.

This is a deeply unnecessary film.

Terminator 2: Judgment Day

Arnold Schwarzenegger is back from the future as the dead-pan cyborg with a penchant for leather.

This time Arnie gets to play the good robot reprogrammed to prevent Armageddon by saving the young John Connor (Edward Furlong) from a shape-shifting T-1000 (Robert Patrick) hell bent on his termination in order to change the course of history.

Boasting ground breaking special effects, a superb score, an involved storyline and some terrific performances T2 is a rare example of blockbuster with as much brain as brawn.

Who didn’t have a tear in their eye when Arnie got lowered into the molten lava at the end? You had something in your eye right? Right. I emerged blinking from the local Odeon in 1991 thinking this was the best film ever made.

After escaping Cyberdyne Systems HQ, John Connor is pursued by the T-1000 who crashes through a 6th story window on a motorbike into the path of a police chopper circling the building. It head buts its way through the windscreen and pours itself onto the passenger seat. The pilot sensibly decides to take his chances with the concrete below when told to get out.

The T1000 catches up with the escaping van weaving through traffic. After an exchange of gunfire Arnie slams on the brakes and the chopper, which is at street level, plows into the back of the van, splits and then bursts into flames scattering debris as the wreckage skids across the road.

Artistic merit

James Cameron is not normally a director who does anything by halves however this explosion feels slightly underwhelming. Although it looks genuine, the stunt feels staged and the pyrotechnics are over far too quickly.

Exploding helicopter innovation

First time a van has been rear ended by a helicopter? I’m grasping at straws here.

Do the passengers survive?

The T-1000 is virtually indestructible so it’s going to take more than a minor exploding helicopter to slow it down.

Positives

Helicopter versus van? There can only be one winner. I wouldn’t like to be the insurance clerk handling that claim. Where on earth are you going to hire a courtesy helicopter from?

Negatives

Why do so many pilots decide to fly helicopters at ground level? The point of a helicopter is to give the pilot aerial superiority. Mankind is safe when computers are as stupid as this.

Favourite Quote:

T-800: “I need your clothes, boots and your motorcycle”

Interesting Fact

Arnie ad-libs the line "I need a vacation", when the T-800 is taking a battering. This line was a nod to his role in Kindergarten Cop and was not in the original script.

Broken Arrow

I’d heard rumours Broken Arrow could be an exploding helicopter classic. With whispers it might contain no fewer than three chopper fireballs. Broken Arrow didn’t disappoint. In fact it exceeded expectation, delivering four, yes, FOUR exploding helicopters.

The plot sees renegade air force pilot John Travolta steal some nuclear bombs by faking the crash of his bomber. His co-pilot (Christian Slater), who’s not in on the plot, tries to get them back.

The action begins when Christian Slater – overdue for the sort of Hollywood career resurrection from which Travolta benefited – is trapped in a canyon with a local park ranger he’s been thrown together with.

One of Travolta’s henchmen has commandeered a helicopter and is in pursuit of the couple. Slater’s plucky companion distracts the chopper pilot whilst he takes aim with a pistol. He shoots the pilot causing the copter to cartwheel forward. The rotor blades crunch into the ground and shear off. However, the momentum takes the chassis forward causing the tail rotors to flip forward and nearly shear the park ranger in two. Fortunately, Slater miraculously – very miraculous as he was previously a 100 yards away – appears and pulls her to safety. Whereupon the helicopter blows up.

Or does it? Because director John Woo, perhaps in a bid to save time, money or effort cheats with the camera angle. We don’t see the helicopter actually explode, we just see flames appear from the place we expect the chopper‘s wreckage to be.

Later in the film one of the stolen nukes explodes just as an army helicopter is on the verge of apprehending John Travolta. The resulting electro-magnetic pulse shuts down the electronics on the helicopter causing the pilot to lose control. It had been hovering just above the ground and suddenly pitches forward. The rotor blades again sheer off as the impact on the ground. It rolls forward and explodes in a sumptuous fireball of saturated oranges.

“I said goddamn what a rush!” Says Travolta in the tic-heavy, mannered style he‘s mistaken for acting in this film.
John Woo doesn’t cheat with this explosion. We get to see it in all its rich Technicolor glory. However, the one minor gripe is that someone on the special effects team was clearly too trigger happy with the old detonator as the helicopter explosion starts a fraction before it hits the ground. Sloppy.

As the film approaches its climax Travolta attempts to make good his escape with the nuclear bomb on a freight train. Slater has been dropped onto the train by an army helicopter, which continues to maintain a close presence in an attempt to help. However, with the freight train heading towards a tunnel the pilot leaves it too long to pull up and avoid the oncoming cliff. The helicopter, predictably, explodes.

John Woo treats the audience to several views of this explosion. Perhaps to convince us that he really is blowing up the helicopter this time. Minor gripes, are the utterly hapless piloting of the chopper. Would a military pilot really be so stupid to steer directly into a cliff?

As the fight continues along the train we see that a helicopter has been parked on one of the trains carriages. Slater evades the goon and is able to hide underneath the train. Travolta believing its time to leave orders everyone to the chopper. However, there’s a fuel leak and before the pilot can heed Travolta’s warning the helicopter explodes.

Relevance to plot

Given the military backdrop to this film the presence of so many helicopters is entirely plausible. Woo takes advantage of the scenario and blows up as many as he can.

Artistic merit

Before he ballsed-up his career in Hollywood John Woo had carved himself out something of a cult reputation as a master stylist of action sequences. He brings some of that to Broken Arrow.

The use of slow-motion on some of the chopper fireballs and showing the same sequence from multiple angles are all tricks he’s used previously. Particularly enjoyable for the exploding helicopter aficionado is Woo’s crumpled rotor blade fetish. He’s clearly got a thing for it as he rarely misses an opportunity to show rotor blades getting crunched up or spinning off.

Filmed before CGI took over the world all the explosions have a natural look and feel.

Number of exploding helicopters

4

Number of improbable escapes from helicopter

There are no survivors. Everyone dies.

Exploding helicopter innovation

There’s much good work by John Woo in this film, but it has to be noted that he does not push forward the boundaries of exploding helicopters.

The why and how of the exploding helicopters is all very conventional. However, I have not previously seen a helicopter destroyed by an electro-magnetic pulse before. Perhaps a cinematic first.

Verdict

In Broken Arrow John Woo delivers the mother-load of exploding helicopter action in this film. A minor grumble is that exploding helicopter fanatics could reasonably have expected a little more imagination from a master action stylist like John Woo. But this should not overly detract from a film which is a classic of the exploding helicopter genre.

John Woo we salute you.

Superman II

General Zod, Ursa and Non escape from their cling film prison in space and come to Earth. They wash up in a small town where they’re confronted by the US army.

With the nation’s media watching their every move they engage in a demonstration of their awesome powers. Having seen off flame throwers, rocket launchers and assorted army vehicles, a helicopter is called up and fires missiles at the Kryptonian trio.

The dreamily evil Ursa [Sarah Douglas] is invited by Zod to “Blow the helicopter a kiss”. This she does sending the chopper spiralling out of control and into a wooden building where it promptly explodes.

Verdict

Perhaps one needs to make allowances for era and the sophistication of the special effects, but this is a disappointing explosion.

Rather than crash into the building, the chopper appears more to dip behind it, whereupon the building explodes in a rather perfunctory manner.

Number of helicopters

1

Relevance to plot

Fine. There’s clearly a solid army presence so the appearance of a helicopter is entirely reasonable. If anything you have to wonder why there’s only one.

Artistic merit

Weak. As the sequel to a successful film there’s a somewhat threadbare feel to a lot of the film. Take for example the bin liners that Zod and the others wear throughout the film.

Exploding helicopter innovation

Possibly the first destruction of a helicopter by superhuman power.

Positives

However, poor the chopper fireball is, the scene does allow Sarah Douglas to demonstrate her deadly allure. Sidling through the film as a dominatrix diva the deadly kiss she blows the helicopter encapsulates her intoxicating evil allure.

Negatives

Sarah Douglas aside the sequence is rather dull, utterly lacking in dramatic tension.