Firepower

Here’s a challenge: name a Michael Winner film not called Death Wish. Tricky, isn’t it?

For a man so famous for being a film director, he really didn’t make very many famous films. These days, if anyone remembers him at all, it’s as a notoriously waspish restaurant critic or a smug-faced presence in car insurance commercials.

But never let it be said that this blog is afraid of terrible movie-making. Throwing any notion of quality control to the wind, Exploding Helicopter has dived into one of the dustier corners of the Winner cinematic canon, so you don’t have to.

And so we present the bonkers, twisty, unforgettable-but-not-in-a-good way thriller: Firepower (1979).

The plot

Sitting comfortably? Good. Now, maybe pop a couple of paracetamols before reading on…

This insanely confusing story begins when a scientist is killed by an explosion in his laboratory. His widow (Sophia Loren: yes, that Sophia Loren) is convinced that the untimely death is the work of a crooked industrialist, called Stegman.

Sultry Sophia turns to the FBI for help, but they’re unable to act since Stegman is living on a Caribbean island with no extradition laws. Faced with such an administrative challenge, the Feds do what any reasonable law enforcement organisation might do: employ a shady mafia boss (Eli Wallach) to kidnap Mr Big and spirit him back to the US on their behalf.

So far, so sensible, right? But we’re only getting started... Next, the mafia don calls up a retired hitman (James Coburn) to carry out the killing. And the contract killer’s first step is to recruit his secret identical twin brother – also played by James Coburn. At this point, you’re barely ten minutes into the film, and the layers of bunkum and confusion just continue to multiply and sprawl. Half an hour in, Exploding Helicopter needed to have a nice lie-down on the sofa.

Over two very long hours, the film hits you with an unrelenting barrage of double-crosses, secret identities and hidden agendas. You’re left with the sense that nobody in the film really has the faintest clue what’s going on – and if they do, they certainly didn’t tell Michael Winner.

The cast

Befitting a film that’s so all over the shop, the cast is an eclectic jumble of famous actors, familiar faces, and ‘what the hell are they doing in this?’ cameos.

Topping the bill is lanky-limbed leading man, James Coburn and Euro-cinema royalty, Sophia Loren. They’re both fine actors, but as an onscreen pairing they have all the easy rapport and natural chemistry of breakfast telly’s Piers Morgan and Susannah Reid.

Alongside them, there’s a rogue’s gallery of character and bit-part actors including the aforementioned Eli Wallach, Vincent Gardenia (Death Wish) and Dominic ‘Junior Soprano’ Chianese. Bringing a further positive, rosy glow to the proceedings is OJ Simpson who, as per usual, murders his lines with the same alacrity with which he reputedly murdered his own wife. (Fun fact: for some reason, Simpson seems to appear with puzzling regularity in films where helicopters explode.)

Anyone not already dizzy from this pick n’ mix bag of job-hungry thesps will surely be knocked out (pun very much intended) by the appearance of legendary boxer, Jake La Motta. As a villain’s henchman, the original Raging Bull turns in a performance so woefully inadequate that you’ll be wishing for one of his roundhouse punches just to get it all over with.

Finally, as a ridiculous cherry on the top, Fifties Hollywood beefcake Victor Mature wanders in from a busy retirement on the golf course to half-heartedly appear in a solitary scene. Less hole-in-one: more one-scene-and-gone.

Winner proves a winner

With such an impenetrable plot and a dog’s breakfast of a cast, Michael Winner would seem a potentially fatal choice to direct this (or frankly any) film.

Boasting a filmmaking style variously described as “crass”, “primitive” and “suitable for people who like to slow down at traffic accidents”, Bolshie Mike might appear singularly ill-equipped to salvage this project. And yet, it’s his blunderbuss approach that prevents Firepower from being a total disaster.

With nothing to be gained from engaging with the material, the reliably artless Winner simply ignores it. Instead, he simply stuffs the film with a dizzying kaleidoscope of car chases, gun fights and exotic locations – all meant to distract you from the fact that the whole thing is unfathomable guff.

And should any viewers find the movie’s sensory assault and lack of narrative sense a bit much, just remember the immortal words of its late director: ‘Calm down, dear.’ Firepower may not make a lick of sense, but it doesn’t lack for spectacle – and it’s certainly never boring.

Exploding helicopter action

After kidnapping the Mr Big Industrialist, Coburn makes his getaway pursued by the villains’ henchmen. (Incidentally, by this point it seems utterly unclear which of the ‘twin’ brothers Coburn is meant to be playing, not least to Michael Winner.)

Luckily, Old Longshanks (or his twin) has anticipated the baddies’ pursuit plans, and cannily placed a series of time-delayed bombs in their vehicles. One of them, as you can doubtless surmise, is a helicopter.

A hectic chase ensures, and after a few minutes one of the bombs reliably detonates and puts paid to a pursuing car. But that still leaves a helicopter buzzing ominously overhead and a small posse of horse-riding heavies on Coburn’s trail.

The villains close in and it looks like it’s about to get sticky for Big Jim. Fortunately, with contrived good fortune, the chopper chooses that very moment to blow up. And if that wasn’t lucky enough, the falling debris knocks out the henchmen on horseback. It’s like three cherries lining up on a one-armed bandit.

Exploding helicopter verdict

We get an all too brief shot of the helicopter blowing up, although blowing apart would be a more accurate description. The combusting chopper is clearly an Airfix-quality model, and there’s a noticeable lack of actual fire – though predictably the whole thing is engulfed in blazing flames by the time it crashes to the ground. Having said that, continuity is the least of this film’s problems.

Interesting fact

Apparently, the script for Firepower started life as a Dirty Harry sequel. Clint Eastwood can consider himself very lucky, punk, that he never got embroiled in such a ghastly, giddy mess.

Capricorn One

A wise man once said that sometimes the expectation of seeing a helicopter explode in a film is just as rewarding as the moment itself. Such was the case when I sat through 70’s conspiracy thriller Capricorn One (1978), recently.

Set in a kind of 70’s alternate reality where the US is engaged in a space race to get a man (or men) on Mars, we’re drawn into a world of subterfuge and conspiracy as they attempt to fake the landing and subsequently prevent anyone from finding out.

The motive for faking the mission comes after an oversight by NASA boffins leaves the shuttle’s life-support system ill-equipped to, well, support any life. Rendering it just a “system”, I suppose.

So as not to lose face in front of the pen pushers in Congress by postponing the mission, Dr Kelloway (played to perfection by Hal Holbrook) decides to fake the mission.

His plan is to send an empty shuttle into space and rely on his snake-like powers of persuasion and a couple of guarded threats to bring our reluctant astronauts on side - played by James Brolin, Sam Waterston and OJ Simpson.

After that, all the astronauts need to do is enact the actual Mars landing on a specially constructed sound-stage somewhere in the middle of the Nevada desert.

And this is where things get interesting. When the real shuttle unexpectedly burns up upon re-entering Earth’s atmosphere, killing all of its supposed crew, it’s down to Dr Kelloway to ensure the astronauts - who are now dead to the world – follow, tout suite.

Acting more like college drop-outs than scientists - Brolin, Waterston & OJ play the least convincing astronauts you’re likely to meet this side of spring-break in Fort Lauderdale. How OJ was even chosen for this mission - remember, this mission was meant to be genuine to begin with! - defies belief.

Regardless, these chumps miraculously manage to escape the secret government compound in the desert and spend, more or less, the entire 3rd act of the film involved in a cat and mouse chase with two mysterious black military helicopters.

It’s at this point that my anticipation levels went through the roof. We know these birds are going down in a plume of smoke and twisted metal - it’s just a question of how and when.

With endless possibilities racing through my mind, I can barely be bothered with the other plot line involving rogue journalist Elliot Gould and his attempts to blow the whistle on the whole charade.

So, back to the exploding helicopters and it’s a whole 115 minutes into the films runtime that director Peter Hyams finally shows us what kind of a man he is. Albeit, with the help of some pretty heavyweight Hollywood muscle.

In one of cinema’s more bizarre cameos, Telly Savalas makes a surprisingly comic turn as a narcky old crop-duster pilot who agrees to lend Gould the use of his biplane to search for the missing astronauts.

This leads to an impressive aerial dog-fight between the plane and the two choppers, with Brolin clinging grimly to the plane’s wing. With jagged rocks and hazardous terrain aplenty, it becomes clear how these two choppers will meet their inevitable demise.

Savalas plunges the crop-duster towards an incoming cliff face, barking at Gould to “pull the lever” and release the crop spray. Temporarily blinded, our hapless chopper pilots career into the rock face.

Quite how they hadn’t foreseen this impending obstacle baffles me - movie pilots seem to be devoid of all spatial awareness and depth of field, I’ve noticed.

Chopper one hits the rock face nose first and drops like a stone. No explosion. Was someone asleep on the job. I break into a cold sweat. Surely we haven’t come this far together be denied at the final hurdle?

Fortunately, the pyro-technician for the second chopper is wide awake and it goes up like a Christmas tree. Normality restored, I can relax a little.

For reasons I’m not quite sure, Savalas then shouts “perverts!” for comic effect. By this point one can only assume that Gould was scrabbling to find the lever with the words ‘ejector seat’ on it.

With these two relatively pedestrian helicopter explosions out of the way we’re then treated to one of the strangest sequences to end a movie ever committed to film.

Brolin runs in slow-motion through a cemetery to gatecrash his own funeral. Hyams repeatedly cuts away to the mourners, who remain at normal speed, then back to slow-mo Brolin, and so on and so on, for what seems like an eternity.

What grates about this scene is that Hyams could have employed the same technique to much better effect on the previous helicopter explosions.

“Pervert!” I say.

Number of exploding helicopters

One.

Exploding helicopter innovation

None really. Relatively predictable helicopter vs. rock face premise. Standard usage of 70s pyrotechnics and remote controlled chopper technology. No gimmickry. Old-school.

Positives

The expectation of seeing these two choppers explode far outweighs the pay-off.

Negatives

The lack of slow-motion chopper explosions despite the overuse of it a few minutes later. Unforgivable.

Telly Savalas.

Favourite quote

“Hey, Dr. Kelloway. Funny thing happened on the way to Mars.”

Interesting fact

The film features two military “black helicopters”, which is now a term that’s become synonymous with conspiratorial military activity in the United States.

Review by: Boty

Check out the Exploding Helicopter podcast episode on Capricorn One on iTunes, Podomatic, YourListen or Stitcher.